Hilarious Tweets About Coworkers Everyone Will Understand
"How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives," wrote author Annie Dillard. For most people, a huge chunk of our day is spent at work. It adds up to more than 13 years over a lifetime (even more if you put in overtime), which is the equivalent of around 90,000 hours.
It’s a sobering thought if you don’t enjoy your job — which is the majority of people, if a 2013 Gallup study of 142 countries is to be believed. Researchers concluded that only 13 percent of global workers felt engaged and committed to their work.
That’s a lot of miserable employees. So what’s the answer? More money? A longer lunch break? Free snacks? All those things would probably make most people’s working day a little more bearable. But according to several studies, a friendly dynamic among coworkers is one of the most important factors for workplace satisfaction.
One survey found that a good relationship with colleagues is the No. 1 reason people stay in their jobs. If you don’t have a great relationship with your coworkers, take comfort in the fact that you’re not alone. If Twitter is anything to go by, the working world is full of people who can’t stand — or understand — their coworkers.
These tweets about coworkers range from the raging to the ridiculous. There’s something for everyone.
When Revenge Is Social
A little LinkedIn tomfoolery — it’s the workplace equivalent of pranking your sibling’s phone.
When You’ll Do Anything to Spice Up the Day
A simple tweak to your email signature can make things a lot more interesting in the office.
When You Just Can’t Relate
We’re guessing this one doesn’t work for Hallmark.
When You’ll Do Anything to Avoid Them
Yes, sometimes inventing an entire person is the only way to avoid a co-worker you really, really don’t want to talk to.
When You Just Want to Eat Your Lunch in Peace
For lots of people, small talk doesn’t go with sandwiches.
When You Just DGAF
Remember Ross from “Friends” when someone at work ate his sandwich? For many, it’s a line that should never be crossed. For others, they couldn’t care less.
When You Go Along With It
Thank goodness for modern technology. Let’s hope that particular co-worker isn’t on Twitter.
When Some Light Relief Is in Order
Giving yourself pride of place on your co-worker’s desk is one way to get their attention. It could go either way.
When the Internet Is Better
Your co-worker might think they know more than Google. They don’t.
When You Don’t Want to Get Personal
It’s pretty tough to stay on good terms with a co-worker if they know you hate their kids. Or all kids. Best to keep that one to yourself.
When Revenge Is Vile
Office food theft is a big deal. If you don’t know for sure what you’re stealing, best keep your hands to yourself.
When You’ve Heard Enough
Sometimes, you just want to get on with your work, right?
When You Tell Them Straight(ish)
This works whether you drink coffee or not. But feel free to switch for a beverage of your choice.
When You Get the Last Laugh
The next time a colleague tells you, “I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face,” you know what’s going on.
When You Can’t Help Yourself
It might not be intentional. Some people are just missing a filter.
When You’d Rather Have Puppies
They can’t talk back, right? But they might steal your lunch.
When You Don’t Do Small Talk
The work environment in general isn’t known for deep and meaningful conversation. Consider working from home if you can’t bear small talk.
When You Want All the Donuts
Who says you can’t eat a dozen donuts? Let them buy their own.
When It’s One Card Too Many
There’s always a card going around at the office. Who can blame you for mixing up your occasions?
When Earbuds Aren’t Enough
If people want to be heard, they’ll make themselves heard. Whoever invented the open-plan office has a lot to answer for.
When the Holiday Weekend Is Never Long Enough
Every decent co-worker knows you don’t need to remind the entire office that the holiday weekend is over.
When Someone Just Won’t Thaw
Sure, it can take time for some people to warm up. But others maintain the chill no matter how long you’ve worked alongside them.
When Their Laugh Makes You Die Inside
What’s worse than going back to work after a vacation? Going back to work alongside an evil co-worker after a vacation.
When You Gotta Make it Official
Complaining about your co-workers might not make you any friends at work, but it could lead to a promotion.
When You’re More Than Just Co-workers
Office romances aren’t for the fainthearted. If you can survive that, you can survive anything.
When You Actually, Weirdly, Miss Them
Working from home is a whole other ball game.
When Their Habits Are Just Ugh
Everyone should be trained in office etiquette, tbh.
When You Really Don’t Care About Their Kids
FYI, nobody thinks your kids are as funny as you do. Even slightly.
When You Talk in Foodstuffs
Pastrami on rye?
When Baby Shark Attacks
It’s bad enough at home. Leave it there.
When You Need a Fake Office Twitter
Just to be safe.
When You Just Don’t Gel
Not all memes are funny. Repeat: Not all memes are funny.
When You Feel Like a Fraud
Make that 95 percent.
When They Play You For a Fool
Nobody likes being taken advantage of.
When Rules Are Rules
Do all three, and you’re the devil.
When Your Bathroom Timing Is Way Off
There’s no getting around this. You’ll get the blame, for sure.
When You’re a Philistine
This is cute — when your grandparents do it.
When They See Everything
When You Rarely Make Eye Contact
It’s a sign of the times.
When the Office Bathroom Is All Over the ‘Gram
First world problems.
When You Can Pee, But You Can’t Hide
Who even looks under there?!
When Everyone Is Too Polite
Just take a whole one, dammit.
When You Can’t Swipe Them Away
When They Literally Infect You
When They’re Too Fake
You gotta look after No. 1 (and the hamster).
When You’re Too Nice to Say No
Cake isn’t always appreciated.
When Open Plan Is a Bad Plan
Some of us just need all the peace.
When You Just Want to Eat Your Lunch
Some people just like to hear themselves talk.
When You Just Want to Get on With Your Monday
When They Don’t Get You
Hey, give a guy a break.